My Ordeal in HongKong

This is a different kind of traveller's diary. I can say it is a traveller's whining.I wanted to write it down in the blog so that i can read it again after few years and laugh at it.My trip to HK does not deserve a quote like ' if there is a heaven on earth,(it is here)*3'.I did not feel any great difference between Hong Kong and any of the busiest cities like Tokyo or Bombay.One major difference is that,the whole city stank like a kitchen and of course it smelt like chicken too.
I was very anxious that the guide of our tourist company will surely speak english.But the last ray of hope also vanished when he told me ' i do not speak english' in perfect english.We had to settle down with Japanese even in HK.Those four days in HK were and will be one of the busiest days of my life.The minute we landed in HK airport,our schedule of sight seeing started.Our day starts at 6 am with break fast ,6.15 boarding the bus and thats it.He takes us to all stupid places which even dog wont bother to mark its territory there.That bloody guide gave us wake up call at 5 am in the morning.The problem with the Japanese guys is that they never question the rules.We Indians were jumping against that guide that we wouldnt wake up at 5 am.So ,naturally it was in vain. For heaven sake,show me one unfortunate man who has to wake up at 5 am to spend his holidays.And our day ended at 11.30 pm .I slept like a wooden log in the hotel room.
There were as little as 5,6 people inside our mini bus.That guide was pumping information about that small and young city with the public addressing system inside the bus.My colleagues had a tough time preventing me from jumping out of the bus.I was cursing my friends who chose HK as their stupid holiday location.My first choice would have been Thailand.Wow! what a perfect place for holidaying.
Our guide probably would have worked in some court previously i guess.He was repeating his every sentence 3 times and in addition to that ,he was asking us to remember it surely.Who cares to remember any info abt HK anyway as our trip was just for 4 days.There is a joke in Japan about the Chinese guys that only 4 legged stuff chinese dont eat is the furniture.See who is making fun of whom.But that joke was such a truth when we sat for lunch.When i said we need vegetarians,those waiters were so amazed and confused and even scared.They finally brought raw green leaves for us to eat after a lot of intellectual discussions.i was lighter by 2 kgs in just 4 days.
We were finally released from being the hostage of that vicious guide after 2 days.Our actual fun started right from that time only.I was thinking that it would be all fun from that time on.But my destiny was laughing at me in the form of immigration department. HK is so small that every 30 kms you have this Chinese border and so an immigration office.2 pages of my passport were filled with stamping in just 4 days.
Once we were back from the chinese city ShinZhen, i was in the queue for stamping into HK.But the stamping officer had an identity crisis with my photograph in thePP and my present face.I was up against a face off.I was called in by the immigration office and one old lady was waiting to give me tough time. She was asking me who is this in this PassPort.I said that was me.She was least convinced with that reply.It had a photo that i took nearly 7 years ago.She was asking me to show me some other proof of myself.I took out my foreigner registeration card of Japanese government.To add fuel to this confusion,that photograph was showing me as a fat guy with big moustache and dark(as if now i have a complexion of BradPitt!!).Now she was almost sure that i was a terrorist who was going to spoil the already nasty city of HK.Then i started to explain her that all those snaps were mine only.The passport snap was my college days snap when i had hair style like 1970's tamil movie hero.I told her now i had a very short hair with most of them gone with the wind and i removed my moustache.The japanese card snap was taken when i ate tens of thousands of calories every day in bangalore and was close to 80 kilos.Even then she was not satisfied .I was wondering whether this lady would bring some eyelining pencil and draw a moustache on my face and check.
Then the real test started.She was asking me every detail of the stampings in my passport right from the very first stamping.Luckily i remembered every date and detail of the stamping.When i told her not to worry because i would be leaving to Japan the next day,she was even asking me to show my return tickets.I told her i am not a mad guy to carry my flight ticket whereever i go and told her to come to my hotel to check my tickets.By that time i was starting to lose my patience.If i had told some wrong details with the pssport,i would be going to land up in HK prison eating garden leaves all my life and would never be able to see my beloved ones ever again.haha.
Finally after almost an hour of checking and rechecking,they let me go out.By that time,my colleagues had started one major search and rescue operation in that huge premises.
Amidst all these confusions and menace of the guide,I had fun witnessing some of the most beautiful cultural shows of China and got some fortunes in the gambling.I should say China is atleast 10 years ahead of India in infrastructure.